Big Dogs Weblog

Sheryl Crowe the Butt Wipe

by Big Dog on Apr 23, 2007 at 19:39 Uncategorized

Sheryl Crowe, the singer turned global warming zealot, has a great new idea for ending global warming. People will be restricted to one square of toilet paper when they use the commode (she claims this is a joke). Not one square the size of the user’s choice but one individual little square consisting of how a roll is sectioned. That is not enough toilet paper to blow one’s nose much less clean up after toileting. I wonder if Crowe currently uses this method. If so, that is one gross woman and it explains why she no longer has a boyfriend. It might also explain why she requires so much alcohol when she tours. With enough booze the smell is not as bad. Here is something else that came from the Laurie David at Huffington:

That is exactly what is happening. 70 degrees in January and 40 degrees in April. That is exactly why Sheryl Crow and I are in a biodiesel bus going thru the Southeast visiting college campuses to talk about the urgency of this issue and how everyone… everyone…. has to start doing something. I would write more, but I have to go run warm water over my hands and thaw out from my run.

For a global warming nut this woman did not mind wasting fossil fuels that were used to heat water so that she could warm her hands. Why didn’t she wear gloves like normal people do, especially if she wants to save the planet? Gloves would not have wasted hot water, just running down the drain so that this elitist could get her poor little hands warm. She will probably buy a few offsets from Al Gore to fix that up.

We are also learning that butt wipes Crowe and David were a bit more aggressive in their confrontation with Karl Rove than they led people to believe in their “poor us” writings about the incident. An eye witness said that the “women” were aggressive and insulting and that Crowe was poking her finger in Rove’s chest. She is fortunate that she did not do that crap to the Dog or she would have had that finger removed and placed where the toilet paper should be. I think Roves exercised remarkable restraint considering her was being assaulted. No one from the left will believe it though because all conservatives are supposed to be evil, especially Rove.

I will be happy to do without one whole roll of toilet paper so long as we can shove it in Sheryl Crowe’s mouth to keep her quiet. Otherwise, unless they plan on making toilet paper rolls the size of Bounty hand towels, there is no way one square will do the trick.

Her name should be buzzard not Crowe. With one square of TP she can knock a buzzard off a deification wagon.

Tags: Commentary